テス (yejun) wrote in omonatheydidnt,

The truth about Code-V's Seo Jaewon

This is a blog entry made by a Korean girl who writes about how she dated Code-V's Jaewon and what he put her through.

While this is not confirmed to be 100% true the fact that fans are trying to make this go away makes me think at least part of it is.

What's written in this entry is all true, I'm writing this ready to take responsibility for what happens after this is posted, even if it is resentment.

Jan 14th 2012: A aquaintance of mine from Korea introduced me to Code-V's Naro and Rui. We set up a date at Starbucks in Harajuku and Naro and Rui brought Jaewon along. The three are all younger than me and also in a worse financial situation. They looked like they were doing all they could to continue living and I felt sorry for them so I let them hang out at my place, treated them to meals, brought them along to clubs and got them VIP service. We became close.

We hanged out almost everyday and I also went to see their performances. After about 2 weeks I started dating Seo Jaewon.
I'm 4 years older than Jaewon, come from a family that's well off and also had money saved from when I was in Korea so I payed for everything on our dates and also bought him expensive brand products as gifts.

After 1 month of dating, Seo Jaewon proposed to me. He said that even though I have no money right now, I'll release an album on May 30th and will get money from that. We then started living together with marriage in thought.

Jaewon's agency was located about a 10 min walk from my place (Jinguumae) and a bit further from there was Jaewon's dorm. However after meeting me he did not sleep at the dorm anymore. After finishing work he would come to my place and return to the dorm just in time for schedules in the morning. I always woke up at dawn, looked over Jaewon's schedule and woke the sleepyhead Jaewon up.
When he had days off or no schedule he'd go on trips, or go our playing using my money. (on average he'd spend 100.000yen/day)
Jaewon who was without income relied on me economically, and I who believed in Jaewon's promise (to marry me) took responsibility for him.

May 30th: Even after debuting he still had no income, so he told me to wait a bit longer.
He told me to wait until our 1 year anniversary. Saying that he'd definitely hold his promise and to not worry..
I really did love Jaewon so I believed in him when he said he'd take responsibility and kept living in Japan.
However, my parents became angry with me for speding lots of money in Japan without working and told me to return to Korea otherwise they'd stop sending me money.
When I told Jaewon he said to wait a bit longer, that after he'd succeeded he'd go see my parents and marry me, as well as pay my parents back the money (he'd used). That we'd show them how happy we were and that they'd stop worrying then. So I cut my ties with my family and stayed in Japan.
But since Jaewon was still without money, and I now had no income either I started working 7-8 hours shift at a restaurant one of my aquaintances owned to earn money.
The money I worked to earn, Jaewon used for his daily life.
Jaewon was truly penniless.

When compared to the money I used to get from my parents the money I earned at the restaurant was nothing. However, when I had money I used to borrow it to friends to help them out. When those friends heard I was in trouble (financially) they helped me out in return.
The rent for my place in Jinguumae was 160.000 yen a month and together with food, travels and other things I spent almost 500.000 yen a month.

I then had to move out and search for a new place. However I didn't have the money to rent a new place and told Jaewon I was gonna return to Korea he stopped me from doing so. In the end, after Jaewon told me that he'd return my money at our 1 year anniversary, I borrowed 1.000.000 yen from a friend and rented a new place. Also in Jinguumae.
During all this I had trouble with my visa and was told I had to return to Korea. Jaewon told me not to leave and to appeal (the verdict) because he'd protect me. So I ended up staying in Japan as an illegal immigrate.
I really did love him but having to earn all money by myself and to be afraid because I had no visa was really exhausting so I told him I wanted to break up. He asked me to please hold on a bit longer and that he'd return my money soon, that we'd get married after 1 year had passed, that he'd take responsibility and that he couldn't live without me. Everyday he'd cry saying he wouldn't know what to do without me.

For Jaewon's sake I became a victim, giving up lots of things. I grew up in a wealthy home and had never had to work in my life but just because Seo Jaewon promised me I cut all ties with my family, started working and provided the living expenses for two people.
I was the provider and looked after Jaewon. Above everything, I became an illegal immigrant. I will never forget the fear I lived with every day.
Matching his early schedules I got up at dawn to prepare lunch boxes, provided him with everything he wore, did everything for him. Most of the clothes, shoes, bags etc that he owns are gifts from me.

I went along to all of his performances, even to events in Okinawa and Osaka, after he finished his schedules he was with me. To be honest, all people around me and him, the people at the dentist office we went to together, the people working at the salon he went to as well as the people working at the places we went to eat.. everyone knew we were together.
At that time, Code-V wasn't famous so.
Also, the people close to us thought we were married, they knew I was the one providing for him and even their agency knew we were a couple. Since I went along to eat with them after concerts.

Earning money by myself was tough, especially since I was providing for two people and there's was a limit to how much money I could borrow from people I knew. Being an illegal immigrant was tough but because I loved Jaewon I gave myself to him believing he'd keep his promise so I kept on enduring.
Some time ago, Jaewon started recieving a salary so he told me to return to Korea and apply for a new visa and then return so we could get married and live together.
But Jaewon signed a marriage form, telling me to trust him so I returned to Korea even though I was afraid we'd break up if we were separated.
However, Jaewon told me to delay meeting my parents because they might be against our marriage and that we'd go see them after he'd become famous.

Back in Korea I started living by myself which was hard on its own but when Jaewon came back to Korea he's spend 200.000 yen each time spending all the money I had earned while he wasn't there. In the end I got angry to which he said he wanted to break up.
Even though he had repeated his promise to marry me several times a day and that we had a written oath saying that when I returned to Korea we'd hand in our marriage registration and get married after 1 year he told me he wanted to break up. I was shocked.

The mental stress became too much so I collapsed and had to be taken to the hospital. There I found out I was pregnant. When I told Jaewon he acted like he didn't know me and stopped contacting me.
My body was in terrible condition due to the mental stress and getting dumped so I ended up having a miscarriage and had to go into surgery.
I was so lonely and afraid being alone in the hospital without being able to tell anyone..
Jaewon who knew all about this kept ignoring my calls and treating me like a stranger.

For more than one year I had lived for Jaewon. That Code-V exists today is of course partly due to their agency but also because I made sure Jaewon wasn't lacking anything even when he was without income.
I took him on trips, letting him eat whatever he wanted, going wherever he wanted. I treated him to food he's never eaten before, bought him shoes, clothes. It's thanks to me that he's been eating well. I could do this because I believed in Jaewon's promise that he'll marry me, that he was my man.
It's not that I'm dumb and believed in a vague promise.

In the beginning the story was that we'd get married after his debut on May 30th. After that it was that we'd get married 1 year after we met, in January 2013 because he still didn't have any money.
When I returned to Korea we'd hand in our marriage registration and live together in Japan, that we'd have kids, that he'd go into the army, that he'd do his best to make both Code-V work at the same time as being married to me. He kept saying this which made me believe in him.
However after he started earning enough money to be able to support himself, and I kept getting worse, he told me he wanted to break up. Disregarding that our child died and without apologizing he started treating me like a stranger and ignored me.

I'm now in a hospital recieving treatment for my mental health after my depression got worse and I for the second time tried to take my own life. I'm told I'm likely to need to be here for one year.
Cutting all ties with my family, experiencing hardship for the first time in my life I kept living for Seo Jaewon. After his sudden act I now know how hard it is to be betrayed by someone you trust. I really did believe in Jaewon's promise to wait for one year. The one year I gave to Jaewon was so horrible and the future I had imagined disappeared in an instant. I gave him one year of my life believing in that future. I now don't know how to start my life all over again, how to make a new future for myself. It's really hard.

Jaewon knows I'm like this because of him.
Even though he knows I'm in pain, mentally and physically and that one life was lost, he's out drinking, playing and meeting other girls while ignoring me.
When I got mad and told him I'd tell the world what he'd done to me he handed me 900.000 yen and told me not to contact him again.
The money I've spent on Jaewon alone is more than 1.000.000 yen. The money I've borrowed from people I know under his name is also more than 1.000.000 yen. I truly spent a lot of money on him during one year.
How does he think that the pain he's brought my heart, my body.. the life in heaven, the time I spent on him, my life.. how does he think that 90.000 yen can settle that...?
What does recieving that money mean to me now. I don't have any problem with money now so even receiving 2.000.000 yen would mean nothing.
How can he be so irresponsible.
Even though begging for forgiveness on his knees would not make it up to me.. how can he continue on like normal...

I do think hearts can change.
However, I trusted his words that he'd take responsibility for me and gave him myself. He knows what I've turned into due to him. How could he throw me away, treat me like a stranger and meet other girls..
Was it truly love.
Didn't he just pretend it was love to use me for money..
If not so, he wouldn't have been able to do such an impolite thing after breaking up with me.
He's truly a cruel person.
Not understanding what pain he puts others through, using them only when he needs them, throwing them away whenever he pleases, meeting new girls.
I wish I had noticed earlier.

Code-V got a break after they attended the concert in Fukushima to help the victims of the earthquake in March 2011.
I knew about it and my friend was also in an accident then so it's an event that hurts my heart even now.
However, Jaewon was busy with schedules and couldn't go back to Korea so he told me he wished another earthquake happened so he could go back to Korea.
Even though he personally went to a place affected by the disaster and knew people were hurting because of it.
Even though because he's where he is now thanks to that concert, even if he himself isn't sad about it, how can he say such a thing, even as a joke?
Even if he went just because his agency told him to...

Also, Jaewon hates Japan. I love Japan and wanted to live there forever. But when I told Jaewon that he said he's only there because he has to, and that he hates Japan.
Also, that Japanese people have split-personalities, and talked badly about his manager to me almost everyday. If I took the manager's side he'd get mad and said that Japanese people are no good.

Moreover, he said that Japanese girls are ugly and all otakus. Even though I have cute Japanese friends he said that even if they're cute he hates all Japanese girls, and that Korean girls are the best. He only dates Korean girls.
Jaewon is a type of person who has to have a girl, he gets a new girl directly after breaking up with someone.
Because the members of Code-V are older than a lot of other idols the agency lets them roam free. They all spend their nights hanging out with girls (Jaewon only dates Korean girls though). He also calls his fans ugly and scary.
He throws away all his fanletters without reading them leaving me to sort them out.
After Sol said he'd recieved money along with a fanletter Jaewon started opening the letters to pocket the money and throw away the rest.
He only kept the presents he liked, throwing away the rest or giving it to me.
I probably know better than him about who's given him what.

Seo Jaewon does not know what thankfullness means, only looks for his own gain and only loves money. I wish I had noticed earlier.
I trusted that it wasn't so even though he fought with the older members, rushing out during practice only to go to my place.
I kept giving him things when he said he was tired and that his life was hard...
He brainwashed me into believing him when he said that he'd marry me after a year, not to worry, that he'd pay me back, that he'd take responsibility for me, that he kept singing for my sake..
That he started treating me like a stranger after my mental health got worse was because he only saw me as a toy to use for money.
I'm regretting everything and resent him.

How do I get back the year I gave him, I feel so bad to the baby that passed away. It's hard trying to endure everything while I'm in this hospital trying to get better.
I'm writing this because I want everyone to know that what lies behind Seo Jaewon's mask that shines of goodness is a person who doesn't understand thankfullness, a selfish person who only thinks about himself, a heartless person.
How can a person like that sing about a first love. How can he sing in front of people about hope. This world is scary.
I want everyone to know what he's really like. I don't want him to ever hurt anyone like he's hurt me. Also for the sake of my baby in heaven.

Don't you think he's bad for treating me like a stranger when he should be apologizing? I lived with him for over one year...
How can he without regrets live with someone for a year, using them for money and promising to pay them back and to marry them even though he doesn't want to. This is a fraud.
How can he say he'd take responsibility. I'm the one who fed Seo Jaewon for one year...
No matter how immature and bad a person is, how can he treat me who lived for him and carried his child like a stranger?
How can he pretend to be a good person while treating the people that loves him like trash and hope that the country that supports him goes under?

Speaking badly about other people everyday, spilling secrets everywhere.. I do not think such a person should be allowed to stand in front of people singing.
I don't think anything will change just because I write this.
However, if only one person feels sorry for me and pray that my baby in heaven is in peace I'd be happy. I don't think it's possible but I want as many people as possible to read this and that it reaches Jaewon so he'd apologize, reflect and regret his actions so he'd never do this to anyone else. I only hope for this.
I apologize for bothering you and thank you for reading this.

(for more pictures check the source)

source: kori789@ameblo 1|2
translation done by me (may not be 100% accurate but I did my best.)

Tags: nugu, rumour, scandals, wtf

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