12:05 am - 03/09/2018

(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧ OMONA FREE FOR ALL! ✧゚・: *ヽ(◕ヮ◕ヽ)

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Once again, the weekend is upon us. Have a safe & happy time <3
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simprov 9th-Mar-2018 08:39 am (UTC)
wow just saw that jo minki was discovered dead. i hope this doesn't kill the momentum of #metoo in korea.

in my personal life, i keep getting ghosted! sucks to suck, i guess. this is my punishment for ghosting people semi-regularly i think.
nana_the_dwarf 9th-Mar-2018 11:03 am (UTC)
From what I’ve seen so far, the comments have been very supportive of his victims and family, and very unforgiving towards him. I don’t think #metoo will be stopping anytime soon.
cosmicdaze 9th-Mar-2018 08:47 am (UTC)
stressing about how i'm going to get the money i need to study abroad as usual. i have 9 months before i'm supposed to leave so i can graduate on time and i just have no idea what i'm going to do lmao. i really want to go taiwan, but recently i've been thinking about going to mexico instead so i can be forced to use spanish 24/7 and finally become fluent in it since i've been stagnating for literal years with this language but...i dunno. i really wanna go to asia again. i still have some time to decide.

i'm going to start making resin charms!! i've bought some materials but i still need to buy a few more things and more importantly the resin. i've been watching tutorials on youtube obsessively and i'm so excited lol, it's gonna be really fun i think. hopefully i can use it as another form of income but we shall see~

[death tw ladies code / jonghyun]

i didn't want to post this in the ladies code anniversary post and be an ass but i was just thinking...it's so sad how now there are TWO groups where the number 5 and "forever five" are so important to the group and the fandom. i'm very happy to see that ladies code are doing well and still making music and all that good stuff even if i was never a fan (just out of disinterest, not for a malicious reason). with shinee's ten yr anniversary coming up it's hard to guess what the future will hold...i guess what i want to say is that it's just really sad, and i wouldn't wish this pain upon any group or fandom even though we can see that it does, eventually, get better. i hope this paragraph made sense and wasn't offensive, i'm really tired right now. 💀

Edited at 2018-03-09 08:48 am (UTC)
gathyou 9th-Mar-2018 12:02 pm (UTC)
Nine months is a long time! You'll be able to make your decision. And if you need to delay moving abroad a bit so you can work first and get money, it's fine too. Don't stress yourself about it, it will work out, especially if you allow yourself to move forward step by step!

[Spoiler (click to open)]
It makes sense, and there's nothing offensive, don't worry :) It's been a tough couple of years since the tragedy but seeing Ladies Code going back on stage, even performing their old songs (that time they performed Pretty Pretty was so bittersweet to watch, PP's lyrics are so tailored to each member) is so inspirational. Compared to other posts, I felt like this time, the focus was more about how proud they are of what they built as five, and how they're moving forward. Again, incredibly hard but I'm happy they reached such a state of mind. I'm glad you're able to find peace through this and I hope SHINee will get better too (and will give themselves the time to get better, as Ladies Code had).
benihime99 9th-Mar-2018 10:06 am (UTC)
I'm looking for a new drama, is radio romance any good?
noonakaia 9th-Mar-2018 03:13 pm (UTC)
I'm watching Radio Romance atm and I feel like it's a hit or miss 80% of the time for me, sometimes I'm like SO into it and loving it and there are episodes where I'm just MEH skip skip skip. I'll finish it tho'.

My real Kdrama of the moment is Misty and I highly recommend it, Kim Nam-joo is so fierce sometimes I don't know what to do with myself watching her non stop slayage in that drama LOL. She's amazing in it tbh and definitely makes the drama worth watching.

jyusou 9th-Mar-2018 12:47 pm (UTC)
I am thinking of quitting my job by next year, since my recent experiences have made me very fucking tired, so I am contemplating (I cannot believe this, ugh) plans to go back to studying; either save up for a masters in the country or somewhere close by. The point here is to clean the slate, open up new opportunities and make useful connections, more than anything. The challenge now is what to study.

Regarding kpop, with BTS saying they’re almost done with their next album, I’m both excited and anxious. LY:H was better than Wings (though BST remains exceptional) but it’s still shallow compared to HYYH. I know I keep saying it but, I want a quality product, and this release really needs to bring it, both production-wise and thematically. Production-wise, because the mixing quality in LY:H and Wings was subpar compared to HYYH. Thematically, because their Love Yourself theme is fucking loaded, and if not addressed in a holistic and three dimensional manner could leave them looking superficial and sold out, all style no substance. *sigh* Well, this could really go either way, we’ll just have to wait and see.
youtubelargo 9th-Mar-2018 03:22 pm (UTC)
Sorry I'm gonna be a damn nerd right now and ask what about the mixing quality in LH and Wings you found subpar compared to HYYH. I do think Wings has a compression issue on a few of the more lush songs like Lie and Am I Wrong (and Mic Drop is a fucking bass attack nightmare on a good sound system), but in terms of actual production value/sound engineering, find Wings to be superior to HYYH.

Sorry, not meant as an attack, I'm just a music dork.

Edit: somehow missed the last bit - I do have hope for the second part of LY, since one of them (I'm guessing Namjoon??) mentioned in an interview that it would be "darker", which could mean anything but I hope trends more towards the messy introspection of "Reflection" than anything else.

Edited at 2018-03-09 03:24 pm (UTC)
misspoirot 9th-Mar-2018 01:10 pm (UTC)
I hope everyone had a wonderful week!

Rant below - tw: mental issues
[Spoiler (click to open)]So I have been wondering about this for quite some time, but is it normal not wanting to live? I mean like, do we all wake up one day feeling like we have to live for something or someone no matter how trivial? I mean, it's not like I want to die but i just feel there's no point in living so waking up every day feels more like a burden than a joy to me. I wanna know what everyone think of this. I mean like Google says i'm depressed but I don't want to jump to conclusions

Edited at 2018-03-09 01:11 pm (UTC)
gathyou 9th-Mar-2018 01:35 pm (UTC)
[Spoiler (click to open)]
First, I think you need to talk about it with a specialist - a family doctor you know and trust if you need a first talk, or directly a psy - who is able to diagnose exactly what's going on.
This said, based on my own personal experience, this feeling of not wanting to live but not exactly wanting to die either (and thus loosing all motivation and feeling like everyday is a burden I have to go through until one day I just don't wake up?) for several weeks (the feeling has to last for several weeks to be considered more than a slump) was one symptom my doctor noted in my depression diagnosis.
Everyone is different which is why I'm emphazising on seeing a specialist rather than diagnose yourself. Even if it isn't a depression per-se, it's still something that needs to be addressed, and that a doctor can help you with!
I hope everything goes well for you <3

Edited at 2018-03-09 01:36 pm (UTC)
goshipgurl 9th-Mar-2018 01:44 pm (UTC)
Hope everyone has a wonderful weekend, I'll be spending it at work #gottapaythebills

I realized that I have too much makeup and I want to get rid of some stuff that I don't use anymore or have never used before, but I don't wanna throw it away. I also don't wanna give it to my friends who don't appreciate high end makeup :/ any ideas?
benihime99 9th-Mar-2018 01:52 pm (UTC)
give it to me *jk I have too much myself*
You can probably donate to women shelter or refuge.
biene 9th-Mar-2018 01:46 pm (UTC)
thanks for the advice last week guys about my non supportive friends when i was considering teaching english abroad.
i have an interview for epik in korea next week so hopefully i get it 🤞🏻
simprov 9th-Mar-2018 02:04 pm (UTC)
good luck!
and if you don't, don't stress too much. there are a lot of avenues to come to korea and epik isn't the be all, end all some people make it out to be! there are other programs for public school (GOE, JLP) and, contrary to online horror stories, not all hagwons are a nightmare.
i went through the ringer with epik/other recruiters (i have diabetes and would pass interviews only to get rejected when schools found out) until i lucked out into a great hagwon via an old classmate leaving their job. so don't give up if this is something you really want!
yixingsforehead 9th-Mar-2018 02:39 pm (UTC)
here i am again in a 'dream job', and i can't wait to resign and do something more challenging. my brain is just empty sitting here.
give me the weekend so that i can read what i want to read...

in other news i like jhope's new stuff, ilhoon's new stuff, learned the choreo to my fave from last year (move), so the kpop world is good.
timetobegin 9th-Mar-2018 02:51 pm (UTC)
Having a job that offers zero satisfaction is horrible (Karl Marx was already preaching this stuff in the early 1800s lmao), I hope you can find something else that suits you better!

I know nothing about BTOB but Ilhoon's solo track is really nice. I got major G-Dragon/BigBang vibes but with less annoying vocals???
timetobegin 9th-Mar-2018 02:45 pm (UTC)
Hi Omona! I hope everyone had a great week and will have an even better weekend~

This week I realized I've hit the health goals I set for myself about a year and a half ago. Although this was at the basis of the food and excercise changes I've made to my life in recent times, I wasn't consciously thinking about it anymore? So when I realized I'd achieved my target it was just..... a little unreal. I want to enjoy this moment and appreciate myself for the hard work I've put into it, but lingering low self esteem and self critique make that a little difficult :P I feel like I'm in a generally good spot in life though - I graduated university in september and now I'm working towards getting the job I want at a very relaxed pace, which feels great. I'm always full of self doubt but right now I'm trying to stay active and focused but also cut myself some slack and just enjoy life while it's good!

To keep the good vibes going I also splurged and pre-ordered the new Samsung Galaxy S9. /looks at bank account/ h a h a
rosiemotleymind 9th-Mar-2018 03:00 pm (UTC)
Morning Omona!!! I haven’t been in a ffa in a while! Ok so!

My seasonal job as a receptionist is almost over thank GOD because I’m tired. I just got a new job though as the Co-Director for Summer camp and that’s going to be...a lot. But I love that I get to work with kids again. Plus this will look great in my resume

I’m doing the Whole30 diet with my mom and I’m already wanting to cheat because I NEED sugar and I NEED bread. I need these things. I’m not bloated though and I need to lose weight for this wedding so I have to be strong. ALSO! I got tickets to see Monsta X in Chicago and I’m so happy. It’s like 8 days before the wedding soooo I’m hoping I have no scheduling conflicts.

Other than that I’ve been sleeping my ass off when I can and ruining my sleeping schedule. I’m off to make a complicated whole30 compliant breakfast. I hope everyone has a great weekend.
noonakaia 9th-Mar-2018 03:22 pm (UTC)
OMG you got tickets to see Monsta X in Chicago!! I'm so jealous I'm pretty sure it's gonna be

I'm so sad they are not coming to Toronto this year, I have been praying for that to happen :( *sigh*
youtubelargo 9th-Mar-2018 03:38 pm (UTC)
Hey Omona. I kind of have a rough thing to ask for advice about??

[tw: sexual assault/rape/#me too]I don't know what the hell that title is. Sorry.

So I'm a survivor, coming out of a highly sexually abusive situation with an ex boyfriend. I don't really feel like I can say too much about what happened to me. I feel like it's a burden to put on others based on the severity of things, in addition to oftentimes ending up in tears trying to recount instances. Through a lot of therapy, my PTSD has improved a lot. I have moments, but I have come a long way.

What upsets me is that I feel like I'm failing because, even with regulating my life better and improvement, I still am not emotionally at a level to participate or interact on a more than surface level with #metoo. It makes me feel fucking terrible that I can't bring myself to. It's not an objection to it at all - hell, I really wish this had been a movement in the wake of my abuse, maybe then I wouldn't have been blamed for it for years. I want all these fuckers to burn.

But sometimes the mere act of reading a headline will crush me and swirl in my head for weeks. When #metoo was at its height in the US, I had to basically delete news apps to go through a day without having those strong anxious fight-or-flight responses I'd tried to work through. Now that #metoo is in Korea - and again, burn this fucker down, take them all out! - I feel even stupider for being so wound up. Like a terrible feminist. (On top of already feeling like a terrible feminist for being trans. Thanks academic TERFs.)

Like... what do I even do? My therapist recommended the same thing she did before - delete, step away, don't be informed, continue to give money to people who further your causes and protect survivors - but this seems disrespectful to me, to other survivors. Trying to force myself to read just makes my emotional state even worse. This isn't getting into other issues I've had recently regarding my triggers - I feel like I've been in a constant PTSD fog.

Does anyone have any advice? Truly, I'm sorry, this probably comes off so priviledged and whiny. I just want to get to a point where I can help instead of being so tightly spun.
gathyou 9th-Mar-2018 04:24 pm (UTC)
[Spoiler (click to open)]
I'm really sorry you went through this :(
It reads to me that you aren't ready to change the way you support #metoo right now, and yet are guilt-tripping yourself for something that isn't entirely in your control. It's fine that you need more time! #metoo is powerful in a way that all the survivors sharing their stories are also carrying the stories of those who aren't ready yet, or aren't able to. Don't rush into things if it still triggers your PTSD so much. Everyone should go at their own pace. If your own pace for now is to support the cause, but not physically put yourself in and keep your distance from those stories, it's fine. You're still valid, you're still a part of it.
Your frustration shows how much you care about it, but it's hard to help other survivors when you're not allowing help to come to yourself first. I really think you should be helping yourself first, focusing on your therapy, taking your time. And then, you'll feel when you'll be ready to change the way you're already supporting #metoo!
I don't know if this helps much. I hope that venting about it here is already helping you <3
kyokomurasaki 9th-Mar-2018 03:52 pm (UTC)
Hey Omona! aki_san and I went to a local kpop trivia last night and barely missed first place by 1 point lmao. I felt like the questions were the right amount of challenging for the most part so we were pretty proud of ourselves.

There's also a kpop group coming to town in a couple months but the promoter hasn't revealed the group yet, so we've been trying to do some detective work and figure out who it is 🔎
aki_san 9th-Mar-2018 04:29 pm (UTC)
I think they'll probably do another Kpop trivia night there, it seemed like it was their most successful night by far based on their reaction to the crowd. Team YG Basement Squad will return!
donaldjdrumpf 9th-Mar-2018 04:07 pm (UTC)
I'm FWB with this smoking hot guy (Canadian but Korean ancestry), his body and face are PERFECT. I like his personality too, ugh I kinda wanna date him but he might just want sexy times... which I'm not gonna complain about cuz the sexual chemistry is great but like I wanna take him for dinner too lol
kyokomurasaki 9th-Mar-2018 04:32 pm (UTC)
have pizza delivered after u fuq and see how he responds

(also get it Donny!)
daynr 9th-Mar-2018 05:26 pm (UTC)
Has anyone watched Circle: Two World’s Connected? I am LOVING it. I needed a break from the world to recharge and omg, it’s been an awesome check out. Totally absorbing me, I love several characters, and it’s interesting. 7.5 episodes in.

Also, I just can’t quit diet coke.
keytfelt 9th-Mar-2018 07:38 pm (UTC)
Circle was one of my absolute favorite dramas last year, I'm glad you're loving it! I kept being shocked at where the plot was going and it really kept me totally engaged. It's one of those dramas where I wish I could forget the entire plot and watch again without knowing anything. There's some really great episodes coming up!
benihime99 9th-Mar-2018 05:28 pm (UTC)

This was life changing
The recipe is all wrong, they got the wroong pasta, not nearly enough basil, and da fuck is there a gourd for?
But I do love me some Jeff Goldblum

Edited at 2018-03-09 05:38 pm (UTC)
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